We Need the Primetime Soap Back

 People over the last year or so have realized the greatness of the 22 episode, fall-to-spring, yearly television schedule. They are sick of the streaming model of 8 episode seasons with years in between. I've written here before about how I think we need a journalism procedural. But there's another genre of television that I think the public needs: the primetime soap. 

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the telly

The Apple TV Peanuts Selections Are My New Comfort Watches

Obviously, everyone loves Peanuts. A Charlie Brown Christmas is part of our holiday tradition, as well as the Thanksgiving and Halloween specials. I think the rest of the Peanuts canon is just starting to get lost to time, because until Apple TV became their new home, I forgot that there were other television specials and movies featuring our favorite beagle and friends. So when I discovered a bunch of the old Peanuts on Apple TV, I was filled with joy. 

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journal, the telly

I Want to Bring Life and Soul Back to Disney

Bob Iger is stepping down as Disney’s CEO, again. (We’ll see if it sticks this time.) Disney is entering a new phase and it feels like they really need to turn the page. All seems to want to do is make Marvel movies, sequels, live action (“live action”) remakes. They’re missing that Disney Magic, and they need to get it back. And I have some ideas. 

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cinema, the telly, thoughts

Sports Broadcasters, Please, Shut Up

With the Australian Open wrapped and the Winter Olympics about to begin, it’s got me thinking. Not just about the athletes and who I want to win, but the broadcasts itself. I know less is more is such a cliché, but I feel like sports broadcasters should really use it as a guiding principle. They do not stop talking!

I know that they have to throw a lot of information at you sometimes. Though I would argue they share too much, sometimes, because some of that stuff could be left to the sports talk shows the next day. But it’s not like the sports talk shows these days are reliable for more than shouting and the same old questions. That’s a rant for another day.

It would be different if they were narrating the action and giving relevant background information or statistics to explain any significance of a game or moment. It just turns into story time, or worse, incessant rambling (*cough* John McEnroe *cough*). To the point where they’re not even talking about the action in front of us. 

I wish they would embrace the art of silence, and letting the action speak for itself. The good thing about sports on television is that we can see what is going on. The TV broadcasters don’t have to narrate everything that happens like radio broadcasters have to so the listeners can follow the action. They can task advantage of us seeing the players and hearing the crowd reaction. Take last year’s French Open final, for example. From my memory of watching it, it felt like the broadcasters laid out, and from time to time Brian Anderson would chime in with something we would need to know or an exclamation after a big moment, but mostly let the drama of that final speak for itself. 

Sol sports broadcasters, sometimes the best way to do your job is to say nothing at all.

sportsball, the telly

For Some Reason, I Made a List of All of the Christmas-related Things I Watched This Season

I don’t know why I did this. But as I was going, it was nice to see which classics I watched and what I saw that was new to me. 

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cinema, the telly, thoughts

I Miss the Annual Live Television Musical

I miss the live television musical. My musical theater loving heart would look forward to it.

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the telly, the theatre

These Shows Could Have Been on Television

There are so many shows on streaming that I wish we could go back to the days before these platforms took over television. And there are some shows I see on streaming that just scream to me, "this should've been on real television". And I'm gonna take a pretty good stab at what networks they should've been aired on.

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the telly

With Streaming in Chaos, I'm Gonna Check Out Broadcast Network Television

Streaming is in chaos. Shows are getting canceled and disappearing, and all of it for tax write offs, so sustainable business model this is not. It feels like in the next couple years, all of the streaming stuff is gonna collapse, I'm looking at the older modes of movies and television. Mainly, watching movies in theaters and buying DVDs, and network television.

The network sitcom is making a comeback, spearheaded by Abbott Elementary. I also love American Auto and Grand Crew. And because Night Court is back, I'm gonna start that and the original series. I've also heard nothing but good things about Home Economics. So I've got comedies lined up. It's the dramas that are gonna be interesting finds. I don't really know what's happening with that, so suggestions would be much appreciated. Though I did see a trailer for the new Milo Ventimiglia show, The Company You Keep, coming soon, and that looks very fun, so I'll probably tune into that.

I know people don't really care about network television anymore. It was cable, then premium cable, and now streaming where all the "quality" television is. But, as we've seen with Abbott, if you make a quality show, people will show up for it. And networks should learn from that success and put the effort in. Linear television doesn't have to die, life just needs to be put into it, on both the networks' and the audiences' parts.

the telly

Can MTV Put Back the "Music" in Music Television?

On most days when you turn to MTV, it's usually Ridiculousness filling up the airwaves. And I get it, Ridiculousness can be fun, but not for all hours of the day. And it really makes you think of MTV's current programming slate compared to it slates of days gone by. There is the MTV Classic channel, which plays a lot of old music videos, but it’s not been a part of MTV’s programming really since TRL ended in 2008. I know television ratings aren't what they used to be, for every network, so I get the cost benefit analysis for all of the Ridiculousness. And especially in the seemingly unstable age of streaming. But, there seems to be no effort to do any sort of music programming. And I am saying this as a casual observer of the network who really only watches MTV for The Challenge.

But there’s so many interesting things happening with music right now, they could go back to being Music Television.

Since there is no longer a monoculture where everyone is watching the same stuff, you don't have to go for juggernaut ratings, and you can get more creative with what you put on the air. Especially with Paramount+ as their parent company’s streaming service as a place where their programming can be made available. TRL doesn't have to be hitting the same numbers it was when it was the show. It can be retooled. It could be prerecorded, with maybe live specials if a major artist wants to do a big promotion for their video or album. Something to take us through the week in music. With this, you could bring back the VJ. Program music videos and performances of now and yesterday, and have the VJs guide us through it all. It would also make the Video Music Awards kind of matter again, too. It feels better to hold them when MTV is actually airing music videos on the network. And make MTV Unplugged a bit more of a regular event. NPR's Tiny Desk Concert gets a lot of views so there is an audience for an artist doing an acoustic performance. 

Bring back MTV News. There could also be roundtables with music critics and music writers. Whether it be a round up of music of the week, or talking about what's happening in music at the moment. A major bit of programming MTV News could do is festival coverage. With the amount of festivals that are being put on right now, that's an opportunity to send out reporters to talk to artists, festival goers, report on the highs and lows of the festival on the ground. I don't think we're in danger of another Woodstock 99 happening, especially after the HBO doc and the Netflix docuseries about it, so it would be safe to have your crews there. 

Another thing they can do is to redo all those old VH1 countdowns. Top 100 albums, artists, women in music, music videos, break it down by genre. As many topics as you can think of. Even bring back the I Love the Decade franchise. Do you know how many days I spent glued watching those when they would rerun them on weekends. Again, if you want to break up the Ridiculousness reruns, make of these and you can really diversify the days. But, really, doing some programming about music history and pop culture can be very instrumental. Lots of people love music docs, so produce or squire docs on artists, eras, events, and keep all that music alive for people. 

The point is, we're in a different age where I think MTV can shift back to their original mission statement. Music Television. That's not to say you have to abandon all their reality stuff. Keep The Challenge going for as long as it's good. But there could be an appetite for music television again.

the telly, thoughts

My Atypical Relationship with Watching Stranger Things

So Stranger Things is a phenomenon, and one that I've had a strange (ha) relationship with compared to other tv shows that are cultural phenomena. Breaking Bad I binged like everyone else. Game of Thrones I knew what was happening because everyone talked about it, and watched the final season out of morbid curiosity. I've never seen an episode of Westworld or The Sopranos. Probably others but I don't care so much I don't know what shows I've "missed out on".

Stranger Things, however, I've watched bits and pieces of. When Netflix first dropped it, it didn't pique my interest. I've kind of been over the whole 80s nostalgia trend since it began I tried the first couple episodes the first season a few months later and it didn't grab me. And I don't have the issue where I feel forced to watch what everyone else is watching and be part of the cultural conversation. You continue to watch stuff you don't like, I'm fine over here actually enjoying the things I do watch. 

So, season two rolls around, still don't care. But season three, it's summertime and I'm bored, scrolling through tumblr I see scenes with the incredible foursome of Steve, Robin, Dustin, and Erica kicking ass. I make the decision to start the season, and if the other characters don't grab me, I'll just watch those four. And that's what I did, and I had a blast with it. 

When the first part of season four dropped, I didn't immediately go watch. I still haven't watched it. And now that part two has dropped, still have no desire to press play. It's not a spoiler if you don't care if you know what happens, and I know what happens this season and I don't care. I'm still gonna watch my people, and I'm glad that Nancy, Max, and Lucas are joining my dream team. And I think I'm coming to the realization as I type this that I don't like the Byers, Eleven, Hopper, and Will. Would totally be fine without them in the show. And I think the show would be better for it if we just watched the characters I like just living their lives and vanquishing monsters. Oh well, I'll just fast forward. 

the telly

No One Wants to Let Stories End Anymore

Being in this age of franchises, stories don’t end anymore. We're just waiting for the next installment, teasing the next installment, theorizing about the next installment. I think it's one of the major factors in my blockbuster fatigue. It's the never ending story and it is exhausting.

There is a beginning, middle, and end stories, and we've been stuck in the middle of stories for the last twenty years it seems. Constantly making sequels and spinoffs and reboots. Some new faces in the super suits, but the same heroes populating our screens. It would be easier to deal with if smaller movies were getting theatrical runs and not being squeezed out of movie theaters and onto streaming, getting lost in the shuffle. 

And this isn't just a movie problem, it's a problem in television, too. What with the Lord of the Rings show, all the Game of Thrones spinoffs in development along with House of the Dragon premiering soon. If there's actually a new take on the material or a story you want to explore in a prequel or sequel series, go for it. But a lot of these shows reek of having the intellectual property and a built-in fanbase and just needing something on the air. 

We need the finality of an ending as viewers. Because instead of excitement for these movies and shows, I feel nothing but obligation to watch, or maybe not. Maybe I won't watch them anymore, and I'll watch other shows and movies that aren't never ending. 

cinema, the telly, thoughts

Can Reality Singing Competitions Go Away Now?

A new American Idol was crowned and I have no idea who they and I think that means the time is done for reality singing competitions. When American Idol launched in 2002, even though we had the internet and more cable channels, there was still a monoculture. Everyone watched most of the same television shows, but even if you didn't, chances are you knew what was going on on shows you didn't watch. Especially a show as big as American Idol. 

The 2000s was probably the last period of the monoculture. Someone can't be an American Idol with only 5 million people of the American public watching the show.  They also can't be The Voice with those kinds of viewing numbers. And you can tell because in the decade-plus run of the show, none of the winners or contestants have become, not even superstars, just regular pop star level stardom.

I know singing competitions make their networks a lot of money, otherwise they wouldn't be on. I would much rather have all those hours of air time freed up for more television shows to make it on air and find an audience and not shunted until 10pm after these competitions air. When people complain about networks having boring dramas, I think singing shows are the problem. Because of course they're gonna have procedurals, but they no longer have the airtime or prime timeslots to give to some of their more ambitious shows, and those shows get canceled after a season or two without opportunity to truly build an audience.

the telly

The Modern Phenomena of the Actress Turned Producer

It's no secret that women's stories in Hollywood are not treated with the same importance as men's. It's why very rarely are movies that are nominated for Best Picture at the Oscars are movies about women. That's one of the many reasons why it hurts when films directed by women have been ignored in major categories at awards shows. There's a pattern of actresses nominated for Best Actress in movies that were not nominated for Best Picture, or Director, or Screenplay. 

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cinema, the telly, thoughts

Dearest Reader, It Has Delighted Me That Bridgerton is Actually Great This Season

Bridgerton is back, and I gotta say it's better than before. It's a wonder what happens when you actually like both halves of the love story. 

And a heads up, this gets long as I cover my thoughts on the first and second seasons, and the future for the show.

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the telly

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo Should Be A Limited Series

The adaptation of The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo was finally announced, something I’ve wanted and been intrigued by since I finished the book.

However. It’s going to be a movie on Netflix, and that doesn’t feel right to me. Not just because it's a movie, but because it's Netflix and I have a feeling that it might not be the right fit for this book. Just from the tone of the book, I would've guessed it would be more in tone with HBO or Hulu. It's an epic period drama about Hollywood, and women-centered. HBO and Hulu have had success with stories about women adapted from novels, as evidenced by Reese Witherspoon's projects with both networks, Big Little Lies (season 1) and Little Fires Everywhere.

Now to the crux of my argument: you cannot pack this novel into two hours. You want to tell a multi-decade story about a woman, her career, and her seven husbands in two hours? Ha! It needs multiple episodes to breathe and giver her marriages enough time to show the impact each one had on her and how she lived and worked. I don't think it should be seven episodes, one per husband. I think it should be nine. One for Evelyn's early life, seven per husband and those parts of her life, and one for Monique and how this interview and all these revelations impacted her, make her a true character and not just our conduit. 

When adapting something, it has to be the right medium and storyteller. Storyteller, we'll have to wait and see, but I just don't think a Netflix movie is the medium for it. Unless, it's an awards movie, sometimes, Netflix movies aren't talked about for longer than a weekend, if that. I think this material needs the prestige of an HBO or, lately, Hulu series to give it all the time and attention this story deserves.

cinema, the telly, thoughts

The Best TV I Watched in 2021

This was a great year for television, even the television I watched that I didn't fully enjoy and put on this list. I also had a problem where I could not process narrative, so that wasn't fun, so I ended up watching a lot of procedural tv to help me get through it, and it worked. But those shows did not make the list, and I chose them for that reason.

Here's the best television, whether it was new or new to me or a whole new season of a show I loved, that I watched this year. 

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lists, the telly

Musicals That Should Get the Live Broadcast Treatment

With Annie Live! airing on NBC, the live musical broadcast is back! And it’s got me thinking about the next musicals I’d like to see get this sort of treatment.

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lists, the telly, the theatre

Can People Chill a Bit About Spoilers?

Apparently a spoiler got out about Eternals and fans are starting to get into it about the media spoiling the movie when they write their reviews. And one stupid tweet about non-disclosure agreements for journalists and critics that they pay a million dollar fine if they break. Seriously, that is a thing someone tweeted. 

And, like, relax. Everyone has a different bar for what constitutes a spoiler. My deal with spoilers is that if you find it in the plot description or the first thirty minutes, it is not a spoiler. How else would you be interested in the movie if you didn't have some idea of what you were getting?

Now, specifically for comic book movies and the people that love them: check yourself. I know you want to go in as fresh as you can, but just because you found a spoiler does not mean you get to vilify someone or an outlet for publishing it. It's a plot detail.

Of course there are exceptions to this. There are some movies that thrive on the secrecy of a big twist, like Psycho or The Sixth Sense. And there are some movies, like Karyn Kusama's The Invitation, that you should be as clean as you possibly can. That's when I listen to the critics I trust when they say go in as clean as you can and put my trust in that. But that is not true of every movie that gets made, especially for all of these franchises. Sometimes you find things out before you see it and it's not a big deal. Sometimes finding a thing out increases your interest in a project. I've definitely had experiences of finding out a plot detail and thinking "oh I need to see that play out". 

And for television these days, we wall watch shows at our own pace now, so just don't be an asshole about something. If you know someone doesn't know a big piece of information that comes later in a show's run, don't tell them, unless they are the kind of person where spoilers don't matter to them. But if it's a big zeitgeist show like Breaking Bad and Game of Thrones were, where people are watching and freaking out about developments as it airs each week, give time to catch up but don't stop yourself from joining in on the water cooler talk. Again, just don't be an asshole.

cinema, the telly, thoughts

Since Seinfeld is Now on Netflix, Should I Watch It?

Should I watch Seinfeld?

I've never seen an episode of Seinfeld, and I'm not ashamed to admit that. It ended its run two years after I was born. And even though it was on Hulu for a while, they're making a bid deal of the fact that it's going to be streaming on Netflix so now I have to ask myself that question when a big show goes to a streaming service.

Just existing in the world you know a fair amount of Seinfeld bits. I know "The Bet", the Soup Nazi, Elaine's dance, "yada yada yada". But it would be interesting to see them in the full context of the episodes and the show. 

I don't know if I would like it because what little I've seen of Jerry Seinfeld's comedy, I'm not the biggest fan. But I love Jason Alexander and Julia Louis-Dreyfus so maybe I should watch, especially the George and Elaine episodes. 

But it's a sitcom before sitcoms really started serialized storytelling like they do now so maybe I can just watch what are considered the best episodes and not have to start from the beginning. So I may just find a best episodes of Seinfeld list and go from there. That seems like a good game plan.

the telly

I Am Not One Of the Ted Lasso Faithful

 I still like it, it's not that I don't think it's a good show. It must not have hit me like it did everyone else. Maybe it's the earnestness, because I don't handle that well. Maybe because it's a comedy that goes a while without a joke or funny conversation between characters.

It just didn't it me the way it did others. When it dropped in quarantine, I wasn't at a point where I needed a show about optimism and good people. I had also just finished watching Halt and Catch Fire, which is a pretty optimistic show, so maybe I had had my fill on that. 

I'm probably still gonna watch it. Just not binging or losing my mind over it. But I'm happy if you are, I love that for you.

the telly